BEDA - Day Six

This weekend is Easter, and for most people all that this weekend means is another long weekend. However, for Christians, like me, this weekend means much more. This is the weekend that Christians remember why Jesus came to earth, and just how important that is.

Since today is Good Friday let’s start there. Sometimes I feel like people gloss over what actually happened on Good Friday wanting to get on to Easter Sunday as quickly as possible. Good Friday is the day that Jesus died, but there is so much more to the story then “He died”.

There were so many things that happened to Jesus before any physical injury took place. First one of His closest friends conspired against Him and then betrayed Him with a kiss. Another of his closest friends denied knowing Jesus while Jesus was on trail and then sentenced to death. Jesus was taken by a crowd of people who basically just didn’t like him and put on trail, and ultimately found Him guilty for saying that He was the Son of God. One man tried to free him, not seeing how this made Jesus worthy of death, but the crowd insisted on crucifying Jesus and letting a murderer go instead. Jesus was then mocked by the people guarding Him, and His clothing was taken and divided among the same men. They also made Him walk through the town to place where He was to be crucified, and the crowds of people came up and ridiculed Him the entire way. This was only the mental abuse that Jesus endured, it then continued on to the physical.

The Physical injuries that Jesus suffered were some of the worst things that you could ever think up. While Jesus was being mock by the guards they placed a crown of thorns on his head, and then beat him with a stick until he bled. The beating continued as they made Jesus walk through town, carrying the cross that He was to crucified upon, as the crowd hurled rocks at Him. Then they nailed Jesus to a cross and made him hang there until he died. I think that death by crucifixion would probably be one of the worst ways to die. It would be extremely painful and it would also be a very slow death, the Bible says that it took nine hours for Jesus to die.

Through all the suffering that Jesus undertook He never once faltered, He knew what had to be done. I think that the truly amazing thing is that Jesus always knew that this was the way that he was going to die. All through the time that he was preaching, and helping others, He knew that He was going to die. Jesus told His disciples what was going to happen, and that it was necessary for it to happen, and never once did he say “I don’t want to do it, but you know it’s God plan”. Jesus had real strength, and commitment.

The other thing that truly amazes me is that Jesus went through all this suffering for us. To think that we are so important to God that he sent His son to earth to teach us, and then to, ultimately, die for us. That in itself makes me feel really special.

BEDA - Day Five

When I was in grade 12, as per the usual graduation tradition, we voted to decide what people would most likely become. Even at the time I didn’t really understand what the point of the activity was, but just went with it anyway. When the results came out I was very surprised to find that my classmates had voted me most likely to become a comedian. I still don’t really understand it. I never tried to be the centre of attention, didn’t constantly crack jokes, I’m not really that quick witted, and was never the life of the party. I did try to make people smile by being silly, but that doesn’t spell comedian to me at all. Yes, I will never get why people decided that I would make a good comedian.

I actually don’t really enjoy stand-up comedians all that much; the only comedy set that I have really loved was by Jim Gaffigan. To me watching someone stand up and talk at you with the expectation that you will laugh at what they are saying doesn’t seem like something that I really want to take part in. I find that some, not all, comedians spend their lives trying to make people laugh, but are actually really unpleasant people. I also really hate how a lot of current comedians use inappropriate language, and talk about really inappropriate things. If you can’t make people laugh about everyday things and you have to resort to swearing and be vulgar, then maybe you shouldn’t be a comedian.

This leads me to a story about attending a small comedy show one night during the winter. A friend of mine invited me to see a comedy show at a small pub one night, and I thought that, if nothing else, it would fun to hang out with my friend. Because the space was so small we ended up sitting in the front row, and trust me this is not where you want to be during a night of comedy. The first few people on deck were pretty entertaining, and a laughed a bit enjoying myself. Then Jerk Number One got up. He started out alright, and then he made a rape joke. Well, I don’t how you feel about rape jokes, but I don’t think that they are OK ever. For some reason this guy took great offense to the fact that I didn’t laugh at his rape joke and started to pick on me. Whatever, I thought, he will be done soon, and he was. Then up got Jerk Number Two, and when I didn’t laugh at one of his jokes he started to pick on me as well. He wasn’t the worst and did get back to his set. Then the last comedian of the night got up, I like to call him King of the Jerks. At this point I just wanted this whole show to be over and wasn’t really paying attention to what this guy was saying until he started to talk to me. Honestly, I can’t really remember what the first thing that he said to was, but I remember him say “What’s wrong with your face” which is not something that I don’t  enjoy hearing due to the fact that I have scars covering my entire face. (That is a whole other story for another time). This guy just kept at it, it was borderline harassment. I know that he was just trying to get me to say something that he could use as a joke, but what he didn’t know is that I have an older brother who likes to try to get a rise out me whenever possible and I have a lot of patience. After ignoring him for a while, I looked at him and said “Move on”.  My friend even asked me if I wanted to “go to the bathroom” at one point, but I wasn’t going to let this guy get the better of me. I stayed, told him to “move on”, and gave him annoyed looks until he was done. He wasn’t worth making me look weak over.

I think that the thing that gets me the most about this story is that these people just expected me to laugh at them. I can find things funny and not laugh out loud hysterically. I’m someone who wears my emotions on my sleeve; I don’t always laugh when I find something funny, and I don’t cry when I find something sad. I also don’t think that I need to. So what; deal with it.

So there is my reason for why I don’t really like comedians, and why I will never attempt to become one. I will, however, continue to act silly, try to make people laugh, and have as much fun with life as I can.

BEDA - Day Four

Last night I finished reading The Maze Runner by James Dashner and I have never been more confused about whether or not I like a book before in my life! I will start by telling you a little about the story, which I have to admit is pretty intriguing. The Maze Runner is about a boy named Thomas who wakes up in a lift without any of his memories; the only thing that he can remember is his name. He is sent to live in a place called the Glade with a whole bunch of other boys; where they have created a whole society whose purpose is to get the boys out of the Glade by solving the maze that surrounds it. The whole world of the Glade starts to change as soon as Thomas arrives.

The information that I have given you so far is basically what is on the back cover of the book, and it really did draw me in. However, I started the book knowing nothing, and I still feel like I don’t know that much more about the world in this book. When Thomas first arrives in the Glade it is morning and he starts to ask questions right away about where he is and why, but the boys refuse to answer any questions that he has until the next day. For some reason that really bothered me; I just wanted to start to find out about this world. As the story progresses you get some questions answered, but it just seems like the characters don’t really have any answers at all for Thomas when he ask questions, or they don’t want to tell him. I feel like things needed to be explained better.

The thing that bothered me the most was the ending. I will warn you right now that there will be spoilers so if you plan on reading The Maze Runner you might stop reading this post right now. I really got into this book when the action started to happen, maybe just over half way through the book. This is when crazy things started to happen and the Gladers, as the boys called themselves, had to start to defend themselves and really had to figure out how to get out of the maze. At one point the boys, just after the escape from the maze, where standing in front of the Creators of the maze and suddenly a rescue group breaks in a takes the boys away. The thing that really bothered me was that this was right at the end of the book and nothing gets explained. They sort of say why the boys were sent to the maze, but not really, and they never tell them who they are and why they are rescuing the boys. The next thing knew the book was over.

The Maze Runner was a really interesting read, I love the concept, but I really wanted more information explained to me before the book ended.  I know that there is a second book, The Scorch Trails, but what I don’t understand is why they didn’t just put the two books together. OK, I do actually know why they aren’t together, it would be too long for a young adult novel, and of course to make more money. I’m a little cheesed off that I have to go buy another book to find out all the questions that I have about The Maze Runner, but I did enjoy reading this book enough to actually buy the next one.

What a confusing review I have written. To sum up, I would recommend The Maze Runner if you like the dystopian genre that is very popular right now. However, if you want answers and don’t want to be left wondering about what it all means, then you should probably pass on this one.

BEDA - Day Three

My brother likes to bug me about how much I like female singers. He likes to say that if there is a girl singing on a song I’m going to like it. Well, for the most part he is right. There are a lot of female artists that I like, but I’m not a feminist and I don’t like these artists on the simple fact that they are women.

When I was first getting into what I will refer to as good music, I was mostly listening to bands that had male singers. I love the male voice, and most male vocals are actually more in my singing range, but it really had to do with lyrics. It is sometimes hard to relate to male singers when you are a girl, especially when they are singing about being in love with some woman, and this became my reason to begin to search out female musicians.

Three female band/musicians that are among the first that I got into, and still listen to, are Sleater-Kinney, Kathleen Edwards, and Brandi Carlile. The thing that is really cool about these three is that they are different in so many ways, but at the same time have some similarities.

Sleater-Kinney was a hard hitting rock band that never had a short supply of roaring electric guitars, and heart stopping vocals. I first heard Sleater-Kinney when they opened for Pearl Jam back in 2005. I had picked up their latest album before the show and had loved it immediately. This was what I had been looking for, girls rocking out hard. The performance that they gave, the first and only time that I got to see them live, amazed me. I wanted to be Sleater-Kinney. I still remember the lights flashing to the beat of the drums during the song Entertain, it was exhilarating. After that I was sold, I had to find more women who could rock.

Kathleen Edwards isn’t quite as hard hitting as Sleater-Kinney, but she certainly can rock out. I had first heard of Kathleen Edwards from a combination of Much More Music and my brother. The first time I saw one on her videos on MMM, Hockey Skates I believe, I wasn’t impressed. She was different and it wasn’t love at first sight. I saw her play that year at a festival in Toronto and while I didn’t hate her, I also didn’t love her. It was my brother who convinced me to go see her the following winter, and I hate to admit that the only reason I agreed was because Joel Plaskett was opening for her. In the end it was her soft side that won me over, yes, it was the song Good Things. Good Things is one of those songs that I just got, it struck a chord for me and I’ve never been able to get over it. It is still one of favourite song of all times, and one that still brings me strength when I listen to it. Kathleen Edwards is now my favourite artist, and there are times that I feel like she wrote those songs just for me…not just the lyrics but the music as well. I don’t think that the songs would resonate so deeply with me if they were sung but a male voice.

Brandi Carlile was another opening act, this time for Train. This was one of the only times that I bought the CD of an opening act. Brandi was interesting to watch, she came out on stage and immediately I was drawn to her. She has great stage presence, and an amazing voice. Her songs are beautifully and thoughtfully written, and she doesn’t shy away from writing about tough subjects. When I am feeling bad I will put on Brandi Carlile and as soon as she starts to sing I know that I am not alone.

So, what do these women have in common you might ask? Well, they all can rock out, command a stage, write meaningful lyrics, write amazing music, and play their own instruments. These are the things that make me love the music that these women produce, but I also love that I can relate to them.

In the end the reason that I love female musicians/singers more is that it is nice to hear the thoughts and feelings that I have experienced, or will experience, being conveyed by a female. It is heartening to know what another woman went through, that she survived, and she is still kicking ass.

Some other female musicians that I love include: Tegan and Sara, Wild Flag, Joan Jett, The Runaways, The Ya Ya Yas, Feist, Rachel Yamagata, and Sam Phillips. Check some, or all, of them out, you will not regret it!

BEDA - Day Two

About a year and a half ago I taught myself to knit. Since then I have really enjoyed knitting and feel that I have become quite good at it. I have found that, within the last year, there has been a knitting renaissance. It is no longer an activity that only Grandmothers take part in and is now a hobby that the younger generation is taking pride in participating.

After being sick yesterday it has been nice to have something so calm and relaxing to do while continuing to recover. I have heard that knitting has been used to help with ADD. When a child has trouble concentrating in class it actually helps them to retain information while focusing on something else. It is the act of knitting that assists with keeping the child still long enough to listen to what the teacher has to say on any subject. Hearing this made me feel not so bad about doodling in notebooks while I was in school, it might have helped me!

I have been knitting all day trying to finish up a hat that I am making for my Grandpa for his 86^th birthday which is on Friday. I love knitting things for other people. I love being able to search out a pattern for an item that I think the person will like, and then to go and pick out yarn in a colour that will suit the pattern and the person the item is for. I made hand warmers for each of my family and friends for Christmas and I loved watching them open them and smile with then realized that I took the time to knit them. I have always loved to give presents and knitting makes the whole thing even more enjoyable for me.

There is a really great yarn store right near where I live, and the first time I went in I was completely overwhelmed. I hadn’t even started to knit and went in to find some yarn to learn on. I walked in the door and was amazing by the amount of wool that covered the walls and shelves of the huge store. I walked around for sometime just looking at the various sizes and types of yarn. I finally discovered a brand that I have now made my favourite. I love going into this store to pick out my wool with my pattern in mind. It is the most exciting part of starting a new project.

Well, I suppose that is all I can really say on the subject of knitting. If I were able to spend my days doing nothing more than reading and knitting I don’t think that I would be bored at all, although I’m sure that some of you are bored with post. I will now get back to working on my hat.

BEDA - Day One

It’s April and I have decided to participate in Blog Everyday in April. Unfortunately I am not going to be getting off to a great start today due to being sick and sleeping through most of the day. It is now 9:00pm and I am lying in bed trying to come up with something decent that I can post on my blog.

Right now I am watching the JUNO awards, which haven’t really been all that great until right at this moment. Feist is on stage playing a song off her newest album. Feist is pretty awesome. I really love her new album; I was actually listening to it last night. The music is great, the vocals are great, the only thing about Feist is that I wish that she would enunciate better so that you could understand what she singing, but that is really only one small thing. Wow, her performance was so good! I love it when women get up and kick ass musically!

Blue Rodeo just played. They are one of my favourite bands and they played one of my favourite songs, Lost Together. It’s nice to see them all together; Greg Keelor didn’t tour with them the last time because of, I believe - correct me if I have it wrong, an ear problem. I’m stoked that they are being inducted into the hall of fame. If there is one band that deserves to be recognized it is Blue Rodeo. On a side note, every time I see Jim Cuddy I think to myself that he once touched my arm.  

Alright, I think that I am going to end this blog. I know it isn’t much, but at least you can take some time to check out Feist and Blue Rodeo if you haven’t already. I am now off to sleep off the rest of the sickness. Until tomorrow.

Where the Colours Don't Go

Recent events have made me think about myself a little bit. I had another job fall through and due to this fact have had a lot of comments revolving around how I deal with my circumstances. People continue to tell that I am dealing with everything really well, and that they couldn’t image being in my shoes. I am here to tell you that I, honestly, do not have some sort of secret.

In the interview for the job that didn’t work out I was asked how I deal with stress. I always think that this is such an odd question. No two people deal with stress in the same way. I take things one at time, because if you don’t then you become overwhelmed. You can’t let things get to you, and you need to understand that if you need help…ask for help. There is no real way to describe how I don’t get stressed out. I think that if you think that something is going to stress you out then you are going to get stressed out. But if you chill out and take things as they come and don’t let get to you, then you’ll be fine. This is not something that is easy to explain to someone in an interview. They really want you to have some sort of formula for stress, but I guarantee that person doesn’t have a formula either.

So, how do I deal with all these difficult situations? Much like how I deal with stress, I don’t let it get it to me. Sure I go through phases and not all of them are happy, but the phases never last that long. The first phase is an upset, crying phase. I’m sure that everyone is familiar with this one. I think that the difference between me and most people is that this phase never last that long. The sadness really only lasts a day, then I’m ready to move on and do something new…whatever that might be. I usually move on to a mad phase, where I am just pissed off about everything that happened. Then I move on an empowering phase, where I begin to believe that I am better off…and am really awesome. After that I usually, slowly, come back to reality and become more like my regular self with my regular outlook. Then I’m just me, and I’m OK.

I think that for a lot of people they get stuck in my first phase, and they don’t know how to get out of it. I admit that you really do need that time to feel sad, but if you don’t know how to bring yourself out of the sadness, then you’ve lost. This time the thing that did it for me was “Bad Reputation” by Joan Jett. I cranked that song liked it was nobody’s business, and I haven’t listened to any really sad music since. I think that the music that you listen too and the TV/movies that you watch really can help. If you listen/watch sad stuff then it is going to make/keep you sad, but if you listen/watch something that is happy then it will elevate your mood.

There is this song by Sam Phillips called “Where the Colours Don’t Go” that is about the place where depression and sadness lives. You have to choose to stay out of the place where the colours don’t go, because if you go there, well, it’s really hard to come back. There is no formula to keep you out of that place; it’s more of a decision. Take a look around and really ask yourself is this the state of mind that I want to be in, and if it’s not figure out how to fix it.

I don’t have all the answers, but I do have some really good insight. If there is ever anyone reading this that is in the place where the colours do go, please know that you can talk to me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Koh-wPyQvA